Posts

Showing posts from March, 2012

The Answer Key: Pack Lite for the Next Chapter in Your Life

The Answer Key: Pack Lite for Your Next Chapter

Pack Lite for the Next Chapter in Your Life*

When you are coming out of a chapter into the next, you need to pack lite. Far too often we bring baggage into new opportunities that should have been left behind. This is a common mistake made especially in relationships. Please do not allow the faults of your former love to take a front seat in your new relationship. Don't make your new partner pay the penalty for the transgressions of your former love. That will only make your new boo resentful and perhaps create issues for your relationship that would not otherwise be there. For instance, if your former love was unfaithful, maybe you should have seen the signs sooner, maybe you could have done things differently, but you have to move forward knowing that you are better, smarter, and stronger than you were before. Take time to heal first, then give the new person in your life the opportunity to earn your love with a clean slate. Maybe your last apartment came with noisy neighbors upstairs, well, consider making ...

The Answer Key: Getting from MS. to MRS.

The Answer Key: Getting from MS. to MRS.

The Answer Key: The Great Foundation- Love, Marriage, and After That

The Answer Key: The Great Foundation- Love, Marriage, and After That

The Answer Key: C'mon Get Happy!

The Answer Key: C'mon Get Happy!

The Answer Key: Carpe Diem!

The Answer Key: Carpe Diem!

The Answer Key: The Facts of Life

The Answer Key: The Facts of Life

The Answer Key: Increase the Positivity in Your Life- Learn How

The Answer Key: Increase the Positivity in Your Life- Learn How

The Answer Key: What's Your Energy Saying About You Behind Your Back?

The Answer Key: What's Your Energy Saying About You Behind Your Back?

The Answer Key: Getting from MS. to MRS.

The Answer Key: Getting from MS. to MRS.

The Answer Key: If Only I Could Add 'ME' Back into My Ti'ME'...

The Answer Key: If Only I Could Add 'ME' Back into My Ti'ME'...

The Answer Key: Are You Even Ready for 'The One'?

The Answer Key: Are You Even Ready for 'The One'?

The Answer Key: Your 5 Friends and the Purpose They Serve

The Answer Key: Your 5 Friends and the Purpose They Serve

The Answer Key: How to Look and Feel Better Than Ever!

The Answer Key: How to Look and Feel Better Than Ever!

The Answer Key: How to Look and Feel Better Than Ever!

The Answer Key: How to Look and Feel Better Than Ever!

The Answer Key: Job Seeker: Tips and Tricks to Getting the Call

The Answer Key: Job Seeker: Tips and Tricks to Getting the Call

The Answer Key: This Valentine's Day, Just Remember This...

The Answer Key: This Valentine's Day, Just Remember This...

The Answer Key: Grammy's Epic Fail in Whitney Houston Tribute

The Answer Key: Grammy's Epic Fail in Whitney Houston Tribute

The Answer Key: The Great Foundation- Love, Marriage, and After That

The Answer Key: The Great Foundation- Love, Marriage, and After That

The Answer Key: The 3 Must Haves for A Happy, Healthy Relationship

The Answer Key: The 3 Must Haves for A Happy, Healthy Relationship

The Answer Key: It's All In The Approach

The Answer Key: It's All In The Approach

The Answer Key: 3 Steps to Success- The Process

The Answer Key: 3 Steps to Success- The Process

The Answer Key: 5 Magic Rules to Getting MR./MRS. Right in 2012

The Answer Key: 5 Magic Rules to Getting MR./MRS. Right in 2012

The Answer Key: To Dream or Not to Dream? How long is too long to chase a dream job?

The Answer Key: To Dream or Not to Dream? How long is too long to chase a dream job?

The Answer Key: Friendships- When to Let Go and How

The Answer Key: Friendships- When to Let Go and How

The Answer Key: There's No 'D' in Marriage

The Answer Key: There's No 'D' in Marriage

There's No 'D' in Marriage

Yet another friend is going through a divorce and I asked myself- how do we keep getting here? Why are so many seemingly happy couples before their marriage doing a 180 within the first 3 years? What changes and are those changes, if any, so drastic that divorce is the only answer? For starters, I think the beginning of the end begins with you. Many 20-30 somethings get to a certain age, and decide that to fit the timeline they have set for themselves (or someone has set for them), they need to get married soon or as soon as possible. That is the first trending mistake- deciding to get married before finding the one worthy of marrying you. Having that statement in the forefront of your mind changes how you interact with your potential mate. They begin to look like contestants for a game show or applicants for a job instead of lifelong partners. Your relationships become more calculated and you keep tally of how you can make it work instead of weighing the attributes...

Increase the Positivity in Your Life- Learn How*

Stressful situations will come- that's life, but it's what you do about it that matters. If you're sad- be sad. If you're mad- be mad, but only for a short while. Take a moment to allow yourself to be upset or disappointed because that is what makes you human. We are emotional creatures. We all love and hurt. We all feel pain, sadness, and disappointment from time to time, but refuse to stay and dwell in the storm. Staying in that place takes time away from your plan of action to make it better. With every moment that passes, you could be missing an opportunity to turn things around. If you find yourself constantly surrounded by negativity you need to wake up. (Just because your eyes are open does not mean you are awake.) Be conscious of who and what you allow into your space. When you see it, him, or her coming- run in the opposite direction. Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, she may have seen that bitter goose headed her way. We have to learn to dodge the bi...

The Facts of Life

You really must take the good with the bad. Life is never going to be a perfectly molded puzzle with each piece fitting exactly where and how you want it. Sometimes things will go awry, the road leads you to the left when you needed to take a right, and your attempts may not go as you planned, but as long as you keep trying, keep pushing forward and have faith and conviction in what it is you want, do what is necessary, and understand what you need, you will find yourself back in a good place. Every instance, situation, and circumstance is an opportunity for you to show growth and improvement. Do better next time, try harder, have a better plan, and be better prepared for pitfalls and stumbling blocks. As long as you keep trying, you give yourself another chance to succeed. Life is full of hills and valleys. Recognize your moments on the hills as the wonderful moments they are and take it all in. Don't waste time up there worrying about the next valley. Give those ...

Carpe Diem!*

Most of us, including myself can be our own worst critics. We harp on ourselves about all the things we haven't done, been, seen, or accomplished in our lives. While we all have a plan, we must remember that the plan is a mere outline of what we anticipate happening or doing, but life, is full of surprises. No one knows all that their life will entail loaded with its unforeseen hiccups, blunders, and out right regrettable moments. How ever it unfolds, we have to mellow out a little, and allow ourselves trials and most especially a few errors. We need to acknowledge that hindsight should be 20/20, but it doesn't always happen that way, and every once in a while someone pushes the repeat button. At best, we can hope to recognize the repetition, and make a better decision the second or third time around, but we mustn't continuously punish ourselves for the things and decisions we have not perfected or accomplished. Live every day with more intensity, purpose, and passion a...

Sleep Tight: The Answer to Sleepless Nights

Have you ever had one of those nights when you just can not seem to shut your brain off? All of the troubles of the day, week, and year scramble around like tomorrow's morning eggs. You eventually fall asleep only to wake feeling exhausted, stressed, and like you didn't sleep at all. I think we all can agree everyday is not going to be filled with rainbows, gumdrops, lollipops, and sunshine, but it's what we don't do about those off days that can have a lingering affect on the next. Once upon a time, my thoughts would run rampant in my mind throughout the night. Even if I went to bed at 10 p.m. I would find myself staring at the clock blinking 3:30 a.m. and then knowing I wasn't asleep yet would stress me out even more. I'd try to fake myself out by playing sleep and hoping for the best, or I would just give up on sleep all-together and start getting ready for the next day accepting that it would be stressful, daunting, and full of caffeine because of my sleep...

C'mon Get Happy!

We often find ourselves stressed out over all the things we don't have, haven't done, or aren't being. No matter what they may be, there is no hiding from the anxiety caused by the unknown. If you don't make enough money, have not gone back to school, are not fulfilling your life long dream of being an actress, or maybe you planned to be married or be a mother by now, but you haven't met 'the one' yet- are you panicking yet? Before you burst into tears, know this, none of those things are based on time. Thankfully, most things we want to do, be, or have are not time-sensitive. The sooner we recognize that, the better ready and focused we can be on fulfilling our every desire. Make a conscious effort to focus less on your what you have not achieved or how long it may take, or will take to satisfy your desire. We have to learn to stop feeding our anxieties and disappointments. It takes up too much energy, more energy than it takes to plan the course of actio...

Don't Scrap the Plan for the Man

We have been taught that men are the heads of our households, but that's not entirely true. While the man is and should be the head, the woman is the brain behind the operation. We are planners, organizers, and prioritizers by nature. Men are providers, workers, and fixers by their nature. How silly is it of you to expect him to plan out your relationship year by year when he doesn't plan his day until he's in it? Ask any man you know what he's wearing tomorrow. I guarantee you most don't have a clue. The ones that do either have a certain outfit for each day of the week (don't think we haven't noticed), or a really good reason behind it- A. they wear a uniform every day or B. they have their own man they're trying to get organized as we speak. Let's be honest, as soon as you enter into a relationship the plans get set in motion. Whether your partner realizes it or not, most of you are already planning when you'll move in together, setting the ...